There are times when we regret that we didn’t say things to people when they were around us. I lost my beloved grandfather recently and my regret was I wasn’t able to be with him in his last moments, I wasn’t able to have one last conversation with him, I wasn’t able to give him a tight hug, I wasn’t able to say that “Don’t worry thatha, you will recover soon”, and finally I wish I was there to put a smile in his face with my pathetic jokes for one last time.
There was so much I wanted to talk with him. I wanted to know much more about his childhood, his philosophies. I wish there wasn’t any incomplete conversations between us. I guess sometimes things don’t pan out the way we want them to be.
The pandemic situation has been a pain in the ass for all of us. We have been facing great challenges on daily basis.
I was also kind of facing some issues during this pandemic but the only good thing that happened to me was, I got to spend a lot of time together with my grandpa and he told me a lot of things which I would carry with me to my death bed. During those conversations, the man changed my perspective on many things.
My grandpa wasn’t perfect, he wasn’t successful, and he was not even rich and hasn’t left behind any kind of tangible or intangible asset for me. But I am not at all disappointed with him. I just think he is the best grandpa in this world. Because he gave me something priceless, he shared his philosophies with me, he shared his beautiful childhood stories with me, he shared his political views with me and I couldn’t ask for more.
BEING INDEPENDENT ISN’T AN OPTION.
Some of his philosophies were really incorrigible, He says that every individual in this earth has to live independently. Some of us become too much dependent on our parents or wife or husband. He thinks that the main reason why people are dependent on each other is because, they aren’t well educated first of all, even if they are educated they don’t have a certain goal in their life to achieve and they let other people make their life decisions. This is the worst. So it’s very important for all of us to have a goal in life and one must work hard in order to fulfill it.
MARRIAGE IS NOT A REASON TO SACRIFICE THINGS.
Most of us, especially women give up on their dreams and passion after marriage.
Grandpa said to me that firstly one should get married only when they have a proper reason and age should never be a reason. Companionship should be the main criteria of marriage and that shouldn’t be a reason to sacrifice one’s dream. He says even though when a couple get married that shouldn’t make them too dependent on each other. They must be independent individually, should have goals of their own and most importantly should be able to live independently without causing trouble for anyone if one of them leaves the other. He believed that if people had this in mind then there won’t be any unhappy couples.
IT’S OK TO MAKE MISTAKES, HAVE NO REGRETS.
We all at certain points messed up with things with cause us a great amount of regret and guilt. Some of us might have messed up the relationships that we have, some of us might have messed up in the job interviews, some of us might have scored less mark in board exams, and some of us might have misbehaved with people and still long for an apology. Grandpa said to me that it’s OK to make mistakes. Humans have the tendency to have the mistakes and it’s totally fine. What’s done is done, what’s lost is lost. There is no going back. So having a regret or guilt isn’t going to make things better. So just move on and quit whining.
LEARN TO LIVE HAPPILY WITH WHAT YOU HAVE.
Grandpa, even in his prime, he wasn’t a big officer, He was just an ordinary municipality clerk and he retired from the same post. But he never complained or blamed anyone. He just said, this is me and getting promoted to that post was my limit, I am not sad about it. Yes, there was poverty but that’s not a reason to sad, I had a family with five children, I had great friends and I almost tried to be happy as much as I could. So don’t ever feel sad about the situation you are in and don’t do self-pity. Cherish each and second you could and be happy with what you have. But never settle, tried harder, work harder, if things don’t work out just don’t give a damn. This thing which grandpa said had a great impact on me.
I wish I had spent a little more time with him and had much more conversations with him. He was a gift was me in during this pandemic. He helped me through my loneliness, depression, heartbreaks, and unemployment. He just told me to keep doing the things that excite me, make me feel happy and live my life in a way I want.
Damnn!!!! I miss him a lot.